Phantom Part II

A few gems from the critics:

A.O. Scott of the New York Times: "Of course, Lord Lloyd Webber's music is the whole point of the film, and Joel Schumacher, the director, does his best to find a visual style to match the vulgarity and pretentiousness of the soundtrack. He succeeds admirably, drawing on his long-ago experience designing department-store window displays to produce nearly two and a half hours' worth of overstuffed tableaux, the cumulative effect of which is likely to be a state of headachy nervous exhaustion. This kind of spectacle might work onstage, where numb enervation can sometimes be mistaken for exhilaration, but this screen version, for all its wailing emotionalism and elaborate production design, lacks both authentic romance and the thrill of memorable spectacle."

eFilmCritic:

"Actually, 'The Phantom of the Opera' feels like little more than a 2+ hour promotional video for perfume, jewelry, corsets and curtains. It's lead-footed, empty-headed and tone-deaf. Were it not for the superlative work from the various set designers and costumers, this would be the 'Battlefield Earth' of modern movie musicals."

Horror.com:

"It’s an undeniably ageless, engrossing screen story: One filled with drama, suspense, romance, and horror. It’s always been that way… until now."

Jan Stuart of Newsday:

"I still don't understand who Madame Giry is, or why there is break dancing in the 'Masquerade' number, for that matter. For some of us, the phenomenal popularity of 'Phantom' remains the greatest mystery of all, one left unsolved by this interminable screen spectacle."

Philly.com:

"Joel Schumacher's film adaptation of Lloyd Webber's The Phantom of the Opera combines fingernails-on-blackboard audio agony with bamboo-under-fingernails physical torture."

Contra Costa Times:

"But as realized by Schumacher, this 'Phantom' is like being trapped in the frilly bedroom of an absurdly romantic, borderline psychotic 13-year-old girl for nearly two and a half hours."

Orlando Sentinel:

"It was the '80s. You really had to be there. Preferably with low expectations."

Village Voice:

"Sure, all the ingredients of camp are there (oh, the hubris!), but this isn't a so-bad-it's-good classic. It's worse."

Slant:

"Like overpriced costume jewelry, this tasteless, soulless contraption is sure to appeal to anyone who owns Celine Dion and Meatloaf albums."

eFilmCritic:

"One of the worst filmed musicals I’ve ever seen, and that includes Cop Rock."