From Reality Blurred:
1. Big Brother 6. The sixth season of CBS’ summertime show started as most seasons begin: slow and tedious. While Julie Chen’s robotics were fun, the theme, a “summer of secrets”, was lame as usual. But soon, an alliance formed, and its members decided they were better than the rest of the people in the house. Thanks to the HOH rules, and to a player named Kaysar, that alliance was quickly shattered, and our summer changed forever. Kaysar screwed up and was evicted twice, the second time after America voted him back in just to spite the alliance. Kaysar may have lit the match, but it was Janelle who carried the torch, standing in for us as she ripped the other alliance (“bye bye, bitches!”). But the most fun was a group of people who were so hate-worthy they even called us “pieces of shit.” That’s interactive TV.
2. The Project shows: Project Runway and Project Greenlight. Let’s face it: The Apprentice isn’t really a demonstration of business skills, and America’s Next Top Model doesn’t really emphasize modeling as much as it emphasizes drama. But on two Bravo shows, talent is truly on display. The cable network’s smash show Project Runway—which debuted in late 2004 and concluded in 2005, and kicked off its second season a few weeks ago—contestants have to demonstrate their skill every week, or else they go home. Better, they’re talented and outspoken, sniping about each other and injecting the show with plenty of drama to make it engaging television. The same is true of the probably-cancelled Project Greenlight, which moved from HBO to Bravo to produce a horror film. When the third season finally debuted last March, the show had the most unlikely reality star at its helm (John Gulager), and he, along with always-entertaining asshole Chris Moore, produced a film that will debut in 2006. The drama came not from artificial situations, but from the real-life struggles of talented people working to produce the best film possible. TV doesn’t get much more real than that.
3. Bravo’s Showdog Moms and Dads. In the middle of the season, a random woman’s dog attacked a random guy in a park. From the driver’s seat of her van, that woman explained in broken English that even she was scared by her vicious dog. She said, “He bite me in my vagina. When I’m walking and he sees other dog, he right away, he jump on my vagina, because he get so crazy!” With peripheral cast members like her, plus an extremely strong, fanatically obsessed group of dog owners, is it any wonder that people watched attentively? The show was easily the best of the Moms and Dads series, and one of the best series of the year.
4. Bobby and Whitney in Being Bobby Brown. After every damn pseudo-celebrity got their own lame-ass show to try to be the next Osbournes, the celebrity reality subgenre appeared to be all but dead, save for the always-dramatic The Surreal Life. Then Bravo gave us Bobby and Whitney in their own series, and they were infinitely fascinating, proof that the subgenre is fine as long as interesting celebs are the focus. Now we just have to hope that Bravo comes up with the cash so there will be a second season. Hell to the yes.
5. The casts of The Amazing Race. It’s time to admit a sad truth: The Amazing Race is no longer the most amazing reality show on television. As the seasons pass, long-time fans can tell that the tension is generally crafted by masterful editors, and even Phil, he-of-the-massive-package, seems a bit bored at times. The show has also turned to gimmicks (the Yield, for example), pandering to audiences in order to increase its ratings. And the eighth “family” season sucked so much that the producers should apologize to the show’s fans. That season was, however, rescued by its often-hysterical cast, from the love-to-hate-them Weavers to the just-love-them Gaghans. And who could forget the Godlewski sisters, the Linzes, or the Paolos? Casting also contributed to the success of the seventh season, which featured heroes/villains Rob and Amber. Casting former reality stars is obnoxious, but the couple did energize the season with their aggressive game play, and love them or hate them, they made the show incredibly entertaining. As long as TAR continues its strong casting, they could have teams race around Epcot’s World Showcase and we wouldn’t really care.
6. Losers are the new winners. If there was a trend this year in reality TV, it was that the losers sometimes win, or at least embrace their loserdom. The most obvious examples came from Big Brother 6 (see above), while The Amazing Race had its share of famous losers (also see above). On Survivor, a show that’s all about competition and strategy, two consecutive seasons saw well-liked survivors take third place in order to atone for their sins (Survivor Palau’s Ian) or just because they were nice people (Survivor Guatemala’s Rafe). Dr. Jeff stole everyone’s hearts on The Biggest Loser 2, while Contender favorite Peter Manfredo, Jr., lost to Sergio, got another chance to prove he wasn’t a loser, and then lost again. And let’s not forget all the metaphoric losers, of which there are so many I can’t even begin to count. As we enter 2006, we can be sure that more losers will come our way. Thankfully.
Friday, December 30
Thursday, December 29
Bottom Of The Barrel
I am proud to announce that I did not watch even one minute of any of these shows! And, I hope you didn't either!
Bad Girl's Guide, UPN. Jenny McCarthy stars in a comedy that I awarded no stars when it premiered. I predicted failure, but that wasn't difficult. The failure was evident in every frame and lame joke.
Battle of the Network Reality Stars, Bravo. The original "Battle of the Network Stars," from the 1970s, was a blast. This updated version was a bomb because it had no stars. 'Reality Stars' is an oxymoron. And the people gathered here to compete - well, let's just say they made the roommates on "The Surreal Life" look like diners at the Algonquin Round Table.
Britney & Kevin: Chaotic, UPN. Someday, if not already, Britney Spears will look at this personally approved reality series of hers and ask herself what anyone who saw it was wondering: "What sort of white-trash idiot is this?" She may never have the emotional distance or intelligence required, though, to realize that question applies not only to her hanger-on Kevin, but to herself as well.
But Can They Sing?, VH1. No. Morgan Fairchild strutting to "These Boots Are Made for Walking" had a certain train-wreck fascination, but Bai Ling in anything was an attention-starved horror to behold: all costumes, no talent and her wardrobe was even scantier than her vocal range. Bye, Ling.
Intervention, A&E. This series took people in deep emotional pain and at very vulnerable times in their lives, and abused them for the sake of alleged entertainment. Just ask Vanessa Marquez, the "ER" actress profiled and taken advantage of in the pilot. Unforgivably exploitive.
The Law Firm, NBC. What was David E. Kelley thinking in putting his name to this dull, poorly structured, horribly cast reality series? Clearly, he wasn't thinking at all, and was spending all his time on the infinitely superior "Boston Legal." This should have been thrown out of court. Almost immediately, NBC dumped it onto Bravo.
Martha Behind Bars, CBS. How bad was this second Martha Stewart biopic starring Cybill Shepherd? Much worse than the first, which is bad enough. And even worse than either of the real Stewart's two new shows from 2005, which is unthinkable.
The Real Gilligan's Island, TBS. The first edition of this putrid reality-competition series made my Bottom 10 list last year. The 2005 edition was even worse, making it the only show to make the Bottom 10 two years in a row. Quite an achievement: a monument to terrible TV.
Who's Your Daddy?, Fox. When this series premiered, offering a grown adopted woman the chance to identify her biological father from a group of candidates, I called it "a horrible, repellant, indefensible television show." If anything, I was too kind. It was one of the last of the mean-spirited reality shows.
The Will, CBS. CBS unveiled this series the first week of January, and yanked it after a single telecast. As a result, we never did learn which of Bill Long's family members and hangers-on impressed him enough to win the ranch he was offering as this reality show's prize. To viewers, though, the only impressive thing here was the utter inhumanity of the entire enterprise. I called it "the worst show of the year," and added: "Granted, the year is only six days old at this point - but for the next 359 days, it'll be the low point to beat."
Bad Girl's Guide, UPN. Jenny McCarthy stars in a comedy that I awarded no stars when it premiered. I predicted failure, but that wasn't difficult. The failure was evident in every frame and lame joke.
Battle of the Network Reality Stars, Bravo. The original "Battle of the Network Stars," from the 1970s, was a blast. This updated version was a bomb because it had no stars. 'Reality Stars' is an oxymoron. And the people gathered here to compete - well, let's just say they made the roommates on "The Surreal Life" look like diners at the Algonquin Round Table.
Britney & Kevin: Chaotic, UPN. Someday, if not already, Britney Spears will look at this personally approved reality series of hers and ask herself what anyone who saw it was wondering: "What sort of white-trash idiot is this?" She may never have the emotional distance or intelligence required, though, to realize that question applies not only to her hanger-on Kevin, but to herself as well.
But Can They Sing?, VH1. No. Morgan Fairchild strutting to "These Boots Are Made for Walking" had a certain train-wreck fascination, but Bai Ling in anything was an attention-starved horror to behold: all costumes, no talent and her wardrobe was even scantier than her vocal range. Bye, Ling.
Intervention, A&E. This series took people in deep emotional pain and at very vulnerable times in their lives, and abused them for the sake of alleged entertainment. Just ask Vanessa Marquez, the "ER" actress profiled and taken advantage of in the pilot. Unforgivably exploitive.
The Law Firm, NBC. What was David E. Kelley thinking in putting his name to this dull, poorly structured, horribly cast reality series? Clearly, he wasn't thinking at all, and was spending all his time on the infinitely superior "Boston Legal." This should have been thrown out of court. Almost immediately, NBC dumped it onto Bravo.
Martha Behind Bars, CBS. How bad was this second Martha Stewart biopic starring Cybill Shepherd? Much worse than the first, which is bad enough. And even worse than either of the real Stewart's two new shows from 2005, which is unthinkable.
The Real Gilligan's Island, TBS. The first edition of this putrid reality-competition series made my Bottom 10 list last year. The 2005 edition was even worse, making it the only show to make the Bottom 10 two years in a row. Quite an achievement: a monument to terrible TV.
Who's Your Daddy?, Fox. When this series premiered, offering a grown adopted woman the chance to identify her biological father from a group of candidates, I called it "a horrible, repellant, indefensible television show." If anything, I was too kind. It was one of the last of the mean-spirited reality shows.
The Will, CBS. CBS unveiled this series the first week of January, and yanked it after a single telecast. As a result, we never did learn which of Bill Long's family members and hangers-on impressed him enough to win the ranch he was offering as this reality show's prize. To viewers, though, the only impressive thing here was the utter inhumanity of the entire enterprise. I called it "the worst show of the year," and added: "Granted, the year is only six days old at this point - but for the next 359 days, it'll be the low point to beat."
2005: Things I Want To Forget
Click Here
Gosh, lots of stuff in there that I forgot about.... now I need to forget about them again.....
Gosh, lots of stuff in there that I forgot about.... now I need to forget about them again.....
Wine News
From Gawker:
You may consider yourself a gay wino, but are you gay and drunk enough to own a collectible bottle of Madonna’s “Confessions on a Dance Floor” wine? Celebrity Cellars
You may consider yourself a gay wino, but are you gay and drunk enough to own a collectible bottle of Madonna’s “Confessions on a Dance Floor” wine? Celebrity Cellars
Simpson Alert
"Jessica Simpson moves into own Beverly Hills home".
-And in related news, Simpson takes a shit all by herself.
-And in related news, Simpson takes a shit all by herself.
Decisions... decisions...
Olympic champion Scott Hamilton's new gig on Fox TV's "Skating with Celebrities" could cost him an Olympic broadcasting spot on NBC. "Skating with the Stars" debuts Jan. 18 and the reality contest runs into NBC's Winter Olympics coverage, the New York Daily News notes. That means Hamilton could be competing with himself in the same time slot on the networks Feb. 13, the newspaper said.
--Skating with Celebrities could also cost him his dignity
--Skating with Celebrities could also cost him his dignity
Wednesday, December 28
Book Burning Scheduled
This book is infesting my house, "The O'Reilly Factor for Kids: A Survival Guide for America's Families". Bill O'Reilly wrote a book for kids? Are you fucking kidding me?
There are so many things I could say here, but I won't. Let's just commence with the burning already.
There are so many things I could say here, but I won't. Let's just commence with the burning already.
LOST update: 14 Days!!!!! (plus some goodies worth reading)
Here's the listing of upcoming shows. Please pay close attention to the times listed. Looks like there will be some recaps shown prior to the normal 9pm show time.
Wednesday, January 11 -- 8:00-9:00
"Lost: Revelation" Discover the complete story of the grueling first 48 days on the island for the fuselage survivors and the tailies after the crash of Oceanic flight 815. --RECAP--
CONFIRMED -- RECAP
Wednesday, January 11 -- 9:00-10:00
"The 23rd Psalm" --Episode 2.10 Mr. Eko interrogates Charlie about the Virgin Mary statue, Claire begins to lose faith in Charlie when she discovers his secret, and Jack is an interested observer when Kate gives the recovering Sawyer a much-needed haircut. --EKO-- Guest starring: Adetokumboh McCormack as Yemi, Ronald Revels as Goldie, Pierre Olivier as Olu, Kolawolfe Obileye, Jr. as young Eko, Cynthia Charles as Nigerian woman, John Bryan as thug captain, Eliis St. Rose as priest, Moumen El Hajji as tough Moroccan, Lawrence Jones as lead soldier, Olekan Obileye as young Yemi and Achraf Marzouki as Moroccan no. 2. Written by Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof. Directed by Matt Earl Beesley.
CONFIRMED -- COMPLETED
Wednesday, January 18 -- 9:00-10:00
"The Hunting Party" --Episode 2.11 Jack, Locke and Sawyer pursue a determined Michael after he heads into the jungle toward the dreaded "Others" in search of Walt. Meanwhile, Sun has a surprising reaction to Jin's desire to join the search party, and Hurley and Charlie commiserate over the age-old conundrum of "what women want." --JACK-- Guest starring: John Terry as Dr. Christian Shephard, Monica Dean and Ronald Guttman.
CONFIRMED -- POST PRODUCTION
Wednesday, January 11 -- 8:00-9:00
"Lost: Revelation" Discover the complete story of the grueling first 48 days on the island for the fuselage survivors and the tailies after the crash of Oceanic flight 815. --RECAP--
CONFIRMED -- RECAP
Wednesday, January 11 -- 9:00-10:00
"The 23rd Psalm" --Episode 2.10 Mr. Eko interrogates Charlie about the Virgin Mary statue, Claire begins to lose faith in Charlie when she discovers his secret, and Jack is an interested observer when Kate gives the recovering Sawyer a much-needed haircut. --EKO-- Guest starring: Adetokumboh McCormack as Yemi, Ronald Revels as Goldie, Pierre Olivier as Olu, Kolawolfe Obileye, Jr. as young Eko, Cynthia Charles as Nigerian woman, John Bryan as thug captain, Eliis St. Rose as priest, Moumen El Hajji as tough Moroccan, Lawrence Jones as lead soldier, Olekan Obileye as young Yemi and Achraf Marzouki as Moroccan no. 2. Written by Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof. Directed by Matt Earl Beesley.
CONFIRMED -- COMPLETED
Wednesday, January 18 -- 9:00-10:00
"The Hunting Party" --Episode 2.11 Jack, Locke and Sawyer pursue a determined Michael after he heads into the jungle toward the dreaded "Others" in search of Walt. Meanwhile, Sun has a surprising reaction to Jin's desire to join the search party, and Hurley and Charlie commiserate over the age-old conundrum of "what women want." --JACK-- Guest starring: John Terry as Dr. Christian Shephard, Monica Dean and Ronald Guttman.
CONFIRMED -- POST PRODUCTION
Yawn....
Here's something fresh! Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry has announced that the scene-stealing Bree Van De Kamp will be turning into an alcoholic. Ah yes. No better way to address the season two detractors than by serving up the most clichéd and maudlin plot thread out there.
Donuts: RIP
NEW YORK (AP) -- Michael Vale, the actor best known for his portrayal of a sleepy-eyed Dunkin' Donuts baker who said "Time to make the doughnuts," has died. He was 83. Vale's long-running character, "Fred the Baker," for the doughnut maker's ad campaign lasted 15 years until he retired in 1997.
Friday, December 23
Top Reality Whores 2005
From RealityBlurred:
1. American Idol 2’s Corey Clark. Maybe he had an affair with Paula Abdul, maybe he didn’t. But it seemed more than coincidental that he decided to reveal this news right at the peak of season four. And, surprise, he had an album to promote! With partner-whore ABC News at his side, Corey’s indictment of the show took a back seat to promoting his crap-ass record (with lyrics that included the phrase “straight up”) and book. The only redeeming part about any of this is that Corey Clark has since disappeared from the cultural radar, hopefully forever.
2. Martha Stewart. She asked for it, really, and clearly embraces the title, even though she didn’t use the word. A few weeks ago, Martha said that she involved herself in The Apprentice: Martha Stewart because, and I quote, “it would get attention. … it was just a job. I got paid a fee. I have no participation in the show.” Um, your name is in the damn title—not even Donald Trump named his show after himself, and his ego is bigger than something that’s really fucking big. Trump, who won a whore award last year, almost won another this year, because although he serves as executive producer on the show and was set to make money from it, he bailed and started badmouthing the show when its ratings failed to improve.
3. Quasi-celebrity/reality couples. This year, there were far too many couples that were either born of reality TV shows or assumed that having their relationships play out in front of an audience meant that they were suddenly huge celebrities (ahem, entire cast of Laguna Beach). All of them, to a degree, used their love as a way to get into our living rooms, and when a whore promises love, well, you know. Britney and Kevin basically sold their life, via their home videos, to UPN for their show. Nick and Jessica finally split, long after we knew it was over, and long after our belief in their relationship had faded. The most tragic moment in quasi-celebrity relationships came when Kathy Griffin filed for divorce from Matt, but thankfully they’re back together. Laguna Beach’s Talan takes top honors, however, for his engagement with Kimberly Stewart that ended 11 days later.
4. The producers of Battle of the Network Reality Stars. Dear producers: Did you really think you could paint some pieces of wood and sandbags, turn on the cameras, and expect viewers to show up and advertisers to pay? Reuniting reality cast members can definitely work (see MTV and E! for examples), but it doesn’t succeed when you have nothing for them to do but play shuffleboard. Actually, shuffleboard would have been an improvement over your lame challenges. Next time, look for ideas somewhere other than a show that was successful more than 20 years ago.
5. Toni Ferrari. Earlier this year, Love Cruise and Paradise Hotel star Toni Ferrari revealed that, because of her fame, she “was physically attacked in NYC,” “was bombarded by belligerent angry nightclub patrons and suffered severe trauma,” and “encountered a stalker who literally camped out in front of her apartment building and threatened her life.” These stories, of course, are horrifying, and no one deserves to be treated that way. But Toni falls into the reality whore category for a) announcing this in a press release that b) was really just a way to say that she was shopping her own reality series. And c) never mind the whole ongoing “Please respect me, I’m a real actress” routine which was perhaps believable until she showed up for her first day of work on E!’s The Scorned. If reality TV has caused one a great deal of consternation, one would imagine that peace would not be found on yet another reality show; likewise, credibility as an actress wouldn’t appear to come from being a pain in the ass on the set of a crap-ass made-for-TV-movie, even if Toni was the best actor there.
6. The entire cast of Kill Reality and The Scorned. You made one of the worst TV movies ever produced. You played pranks that involved shit and trashed a house that was not yours. Someone among you spread rumors just to bring more attention to the project. You should be ashamed—except for the fact that we all loved watching every second of it.
1. American Idol 2’s Corey Clark. Maybe he had an affair with Paula Abdul, maybe he didn’t. But it seemed more than coincidental that he decided to reveal this news right at the peak of season four. And, surprise, he had an album to promote! With partner-whore ABC News at his side, Corey’s indictment of the show took a back seat to promoting his crap-ass record (with lyrics that included the phrase “straight up”) and book. The only redeeming part about any of this is that Corey Clark has since disappeared from the cultural radar, hopefully forever.
2. Martha Stewart. She asked for it, really, and clearly embraces the title, even though she didn’t use the word. A few weeks ago, Martha said that she involved herself in The Apprentice: Martha Stewart because, and I quote, “it would get attention. … it was just a job. I got paid a fee. I have no participation in the show.” Um, your name is in the damn title—not even Donald Trump named his show after himself, and his ego is bigger than something that’s really fucking big. Trump, who won a whore award last year, almost won another this year, because although he serves as executive producer on the show and was set to make money from it, he bailed and started badmouthing the show when its ratings failed to improve.
3. Quasi-celebrity/reality couples. This year, there were far too many couples that were either born of reality TV shows or assumed that having their relationships play out in front of an audience meant that they were suddenly huge celebrities (ahem, entire cast of Laguna Beach). All of them, to a degree, used their love as a way to get into our living rooms, and when a whore promises love, well, you know. Britney and Kevin basically sold their life, via their home videos, to UPN for their show. Nick and Jessica finally split, long after we knew it was over, and long after our belief in their relationship had faded. The most tragic moment in quasi-celebrity relationships came when Kathy Griffin filed for divorce from Matt, but thankfully they’re back together. Laguna Beach’s Talan takes top honors, however, for his engagement with Kimberly Stewart that ended 11 days later.
4. The producers of Battle of the Network Reality Stars. Dear producers: Did you really think you could paint some pieces of wood and sandbags, turn on the cameras, and expect viewers to show up and advertisers to pay? Reuniting reality cast members can definitely work (see MTV and E! for examples), but it doesn’t succeed when you have nothing for them to do but play shuffleboard. Actually, shuffleboard would have been an improvement over your lame challenges. Next time, look for ideas somewhere other than a show that was successful more than 20 years ago.
5. Toni Ferrari. Earlier this year, Love Cruise and Paradise Hotel star Toni Ferrari revealed that, because of her fame, she “was physically attacked in NYC,” “was bombarded by belligerent angry nightclub patrons and suffered severe trauma,” and “encountered a stalker who literally camped out in front of her apartment building and threatened her life.” These stories, of course, are horrifying, and no one deserves to be treated that way. But Toni falls into the reality whore category for a) announcing this in a press release that b) was really just a way to say that she was shopping her own reality series. And c) never mind the whole ongoing “Please respect me, I’m a real actress” routine which was perhaps believable until she showed up for her first day of work on E!’s The Scorned. If reality TV has caused one a great deal of consternation, one would imagine that peace would not be found on yet another reality show; likewise, credibility as an actress wouldn’t appear to come from being a pain in the ass on the set of a crap-ass made-for-TV-movie, even if Toni was the best actor there.
6. The entire cast of Kill Reality and The Scorned. You made one of the worst TV movies ever produced. You played pranks that involved shit and trashed a house that was not yours. Someone among you spread rumors just to bring more attention to the project. You should be ashamed—except for the fact that we all loved watching every second of it.
Thursday, December 22
F'in Idiot
Me. I thought my flight was at 11:55pm tonight. Turns out it was for 11:55pm tomorrow night! I changed my flight for tomorrow morning since I had mentally prepared to be in Ohio tomorrow. Ugh.
Little L.A.M.B
Singer Gwen Stefani made the news official Wednesday night when she told her audience in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., that she's pregnant.
--side note of interest: my boss' daughter attended this concert
--side note of interest: my boss' daughter attended this concert
What a Boob
Sharon Osbourne, had her chest enlarged from a 32C to a 34DD in July, but now she says "they're too big," the Daily Mirror said.
"I'm having them changed," she said. "Ozzy likes them, but they're too big. Honestly, they weigh a lot."
"I'm having them changed," she said. "Ozzy likes them, but they're too big. Honestly, they weigh a lot."
Trifecta Now Complete
Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey are rumored to be divorcing. Simpson and Lachey announce separation. Simpson files for divorce.
Now... can we all get back to work?
Now... can we all get back to work?
Big Brother
Starting Monday, Nielsen will monitor DVR recording as part of their ratings report. Don’t worry, their pilot program will measure only 60 homes to start, so you have plenty of time to erase that shameful season pass to Rodney and your “Ryan Seacrest” wishlist in a fit of paranoia.
Seacrest..... In!
Hours after we learned that Kathy Griffin had been fired from her job at E!, we learned who her replacement will probably be: American Idol host Ryan Seacrest.
But Ryan has not been hired by E! just to work his ass-kissing magic on the red carpet. Instead, he’s likely to be hired to develop shows and host E! News daily. Thus, in addition to his hosting duties and his daily radio show, he’d be hosting a daily news program. That should start right in the middle of the fifth season of Idol.
For his efforts, he’ll be paid in the millions. According to Variety, E! and Ryan’s people are working on “a three-year deal in the high seven figures that calls for the ‘American Idol’ host to become lead anchor of daily news flagship ‘E! News’ and to develop original series for the network via his Ryan Seacrest Prods. banner.”
But Ryan has not been hired by E! just to work his ass-kissing magic on the red carpet. Instead, he’s likely to be hired to develop shows and host E! News daily. Thus, in addition to his hosting duties and his daily radio show, he’d be hosting a daily news program. That should start right in the middle of the fifth season of Idol.
For his efforts, he’ll be paid in the millions. According to Variety, E! and Ryan’s people are working on “a three-year deal in the high seven figures that calls for the ‘American Idol’ host to become lead anchor of daily news flagship ‘E! News’ and to develop original series for the network via his Ryan Seacrest Prods. banner.”
Tuesday, December 20
Friday, December 16
Worst. President. Ever.
Now he's having the NSA spy on citizens illegally (without a warrant).
Article on Eavesdropping
I also find it interesting that the NY Times seems to have purposely stalled on printing the story so Bush could get re-elected. Read About It Here
Also see this Doonesbury Cartoon
Article on Eavesdropping
I also find it interesting that the NY Times seems to have purposely stalled on printing the story so Bush could get re-elected. Read About It Here
Also see this Doonesbury Cartoon
Golden Globes - TV
Best Television Series - Drama
Commander In Chief
Grey's Anatomy
Lost
Prison Break
Rome
Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Drama
Patricia Arquette - Medium
Glenn Close - The Shield
Geena Davis - Commander In Chief
Kyra Sedgwick - The Closer
Polly Walker - Rome
Best Performance By An Actor In A Television Series - Drama
Patrick Dempsey - Grey's Anatomy
Matthew Fox - LostHugh Laurie - House
Wentworth Miller - Prison Break
Kiefer Sutherland - 24
Best Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Desperate Housewives
Entourage
Everybody Hates Chris
My Name Is Earl
Weeds
Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Marcia Cross - Desperate Housewives
Teri Hatcher - Desperate Housewives
Felicity Huffman - Desperate Housewives
Eva Longoria - Desperate Housewives
Mary-Louise Parker - Weeds
Best Performance By An Actor In A Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Zach Braff - Scrubs
Steve Carell - The Office
Larry David - Curb Your Enthusiasm
Jason Lee - My Name Is Earl
Charlie Sheen - Two And A Half Men
Best Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Empire Falls
Into The West
Lackawanna Blues
Sleeper Viva Blackpool
Warm Springs
Best Performance By An Actress In A Mini-Series Or A Motion Picture Made For Television
Halle Berry - Their Eyes Were Watching God
Kelly Macdonald - The Girl In The Café
S. Epatha Merkerson - Lackawanna Blues
Cynthia Nixon - Warm Springs
Mira Sorvino - Human Trafficking
Best Performance By An Actor In A Mini-Series Or A Motion Picture Made For Television
Kenneth Branagh - Warm Springs
Ed Harris - Empire Falls
Jonathan Rhys Meyers - Elvis
Bill Nighy - The Girl In The Café
Donald Sutherland - Human Trafficking
Best Performance By An Actress In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Candice Bergen - Boston Legal
Camryn Manheim - Elvis
Sandra Oh - Grey's Anatomy
Elizabeth Perkins - Weeds
Joanne Woodward - Empire Falls
Best Performance By An Actor In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Naveen Andrews - Lost
Paul Newman - Empire Falls
Jeremy Piven - Entourage
Randy Quaid - Elvis
Donald Sutherland - Commander In Chief
Commander In Chief
Grey's Anatomy
Lost
Prison Break
Rome
Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Drama
Patricia Arquette - Medium
Glenn Close - The Shield
Geena Davis - Commander In Chief
Kyra Sedgwick - The Closer
Polly Walker - Rome
Best Performance By An Actor In A Television Series - Drama
Patrick Dempsey - Grey's Anatomy
Matthew Fox - LostHugh Laurie - House
Wentworth Miller - Prison Break
Kiefer Sutherland - 24
Best Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Desperate Housewives
Entourage
Everybody Hates Chris
My Name Is Earl
Weeds
Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Marcia Cross - Desperate Housewives
Teri Hatcher - Desperate Housewives
Felicity Huffman - Desperate Housewives
Eva Longoria - Desperate Housewives
Mary-Louise Parker - Weeds
Best Performance By An Actor In A Television Series - Musical Or Comedy
Zach Braff - Scrubs
Steve Carell - The Office
Larry David - Curb Your Enthusiasm
Jason Lee - My Name Is Earl
Charlie Sheen - Two And A Half Men
Best Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Empire Falls
Into The West
Lackawanna Blues
Sleeper Viva Blackpool
Warm Springs
Best Performance By An Actress In A Mini-Series Or A Motion Picture Made For Television
Halle Berry - Their Eyes Were Watching God
Kelly Macdonald - The Girl In The Café
S. Epatha Merkerson - Lackawanna Blues
Cynthia Nixon - Warm Springs
Mira Sorvino - Human Trafficking
Best Performance By An Actor In A Mini-Series Or A Motion Picture Made For Television
Kenneth Branagh - Warm Springs
Ed Harris - Empire Falls
Jonathan Rhys Meyers - Elvis
Bill Nighy - The Girl In The Café
Donald Sutherland - Human Trafficking
Best Performance By An Actress In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Candice Bergen - Boston Legal
Camryn Manheim - Elvis
Sandra Oh - Grey's Anatomy
Elizabeth Perkins - Weeds
Joanne Woodward - Empire Falls
Best Performance By An Actor In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television
Naveen Andrews - Lost
Paul Newman - Empire Falls
Jeremy Piven - Entourage
Randy Quaid - Elvis
Donald Sutherland - Commander In Chief
Golden Globes
A few days late, but forgive me... I was sick :)
Best Picture Drama
Brokeback Mountain
The Constant Gardener
Good Night, and Good Luck
A History of Violence
Match Point
Best Picture, Musical/Comedy
Mrs. Henderson Presents
Pride & Prejudice
The Producers
The Squid and the Whale
Walk the Line
Best Director
Woody Allen, Match Point
George Clooney, Good Night, and Good Luck
Peter Jackson, King Kong
Ang Lee, Brokeback Mountain
Fernando Mereilles, The Constant Gardener
Steven Spielberg, Munich
Best Screenplay
Match Point
Good Night, And Good Luck
Crash
Munich
Brokeback Mountain
Best Actor, Drama
Russell Crowe, Cinderella Man
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Capote
Terence Howard, Hustle and Flow
Heath Ledger, Brokeback Mountain
David Strathairn, Good Night, and Good Luck
Best Actor, Musical/Comedy
Peirce Brosnan, The Matador
Jeff Daniels, The Squid and the Whale
Johnny Depp, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Nathan Lane, The Producers
Cillian Murphy,Breakfast on Pluto
Joaquin Phoenix, Walk the Line
Best Actress, Musical/Comedy
Judi Dench, Mrs. Henderson Presents
Keira Knightley, Pride & Prejudice
Laura Linney, Squid and the Whale
Sarah Jessica Parker, The Family Stone
Reese Witherspoon, Walk the Line
Best Actress, Drama
Maria Bello, A History of Violence
Felicity Huffman, Transamerica
Gwyneth Paltrow, Proof
Charlize Theron, North Country
Ziyi Zhang, Memoirs of a Geisha
Best Supporting Actress
Scarlett Johannsson, Match Point
Shirley MacLaine, In Her Shoes
Frances McDormand, North Country
Rachel Weisz, Contant Gardener
Michelle Williams, Brokeback Mountain
Best Supporting Actor
George Clooney, Syriana
Matt Dillon, Crash
Wil Farrell, The Producers
Paul Giamatti, Cinderella Man
Bob Hoskins, Mrs. Henderson Presents
Best Foreign Language Film
Kung Fu Hustle
The Promise
Merry Christmas
Paradise Now
Tsotsi
Best Original Score
Alexandre Desplat - Syriana
James Newton Howard - King Kong
Gustavo Santaolalla - Brokeback Mountain
Harry Gregson - The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe
John Williams - Memoirs Of A Geisha
Best Original Song
"A Love That Will Never Grow Old" -- Brokeback Mountain
Music By: Gustavo Santaolalla
Lyrics By: Bernie Taupin
"Christmas In Love" - Christmas In Love
Music By: Tony Renis
Lyrics By: Marva Jan Marrow
"There's Nothing Like A Show On Broadway" - The Producers
Music & Lyrics By: Mel Brooks
"Travelin' Thru" - Transamerica
Music & Lyrics By: Dolly Parton
"Wunderkind" - The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe
Music & Lyrics By: Alanis Morissette
Best Picture Drama
Brokeback Mountain
The Constant Gardener
Good Night, and Good Luck
A History of Violence
Match Point
Best Picture, Musical/Comedy
Mrs. Henderson Presents
Pride & Prejudice
The Producers
The Squid and the Whale
Walk the Line
Best Director
Woody Allen, Match Point
George Clooney, Good Night, and Good Luck
Peter Jackson, King Kong
Ang Lee, Brokeback Mountain
Fernando Mereilles, The Constant Gardener
Steven Spielberg, Munich
Best Screenplay
Match Point
Good Night, And Good Luck
Crash
Munich
Brokeback Mountain
Best Actor, Drama
Russell Crowe, Cinderella Man
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Capote
Terence Howard, Hustle and Flow
Heath Ledger, Brokeback Mountain
David Strathairn, Good Night, and Good Luck
Best Actor, Musical/Comedy
Peirce Brosnan, The Matador
Jeff Daniels, The Squid and the Whale
Johnny Depp, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Nathan Lane, The Producers
Cillian Murphy,Breakfast on Pluto
Joaquin Phoenix, Walk the Line
Best Actress, Musical/Comedy
Judi Dench, Mrs. Henderson Presents
Keira Knightley, Pride & Prejudice
Laura Linney, Squid and the Whale
Sarah Jessica Parker, The Family Stone
Reese Witherspoon, Walk the Line
Best Actress, Drama
Maria Bello, A History of Violence
Felicity Huffman, Transamerica
Gwyneth Paltrow, Proof
Charlize Theron, North Country
Ziyi Zhang, Memoirs of a Geisha
Best Supporting Actress
Scarlett Johannsson, Match Point
Shirley MacLaine, In Her Shoes
Frances McDormand, North Country
Rachel Weisz, Contant Gardener
Michelle Williams, Brokeback Mountain
Best Supporting Actor
George Clooney, Syriana
Matt Dillon, Crash
Wil Farrell, The Producers
Paul Giamatti, Cinderella Man
Bob Hoskins, Mrs. Henderson Presents
Best Foreign Language Film
Kung Fu Hustle
The Promise
Merry Christmas
Paradise Now
Tsotsi
Best Original Score
Alexandre Desplat - Syriana
James Newton Howard - King Kong
Gustavo Santaolalla - Brokeback Mountain
Harry Gregson - The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe
John Williams - Memoirs Of A Geisha
Best Original Song
"A Love That Will Never Grow Old" -- Brokeback Mountain
Music By: Gustavo Santaolalla
Lyrics By: Bernie Taupin
"Christmas In Love" - Christmas In Love
Music By: Tony Renis
Lyrics By: Marva Jan Marrow
"There's Nothing Like A Show On Broadway" - The Producers
Music & Lyrics By: Mel Brooks
"Travelin' Thru" - Transamerica
Music & Lyrics By: Dolly Parton
"Wunderkind" - The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe
Music & Lyrics By: Alanis Morissette
Lost without Lost
Jen, how many more days in your countdown to Lost's return?
Word is: a dead character is not dead. It's not Shannon.
Who could it be?? I'm guessing.... Ethan. Or... the Pilot!
Word is: a dead character is not dead. It's not Shannon.
Who could it be?? I'm guessing.... Ethan. Or... the Pilot!
Alias is back!
Okay, thanks to my Tivo and its temporary move back to Wednesdays, I caught the last two Alias eps. Wow! This show is in much better shape than I thought. How exhilarating to see Sark AND Syd's mom in the last two episodes! Sark's episode was rather hilarious. He slept with Rachel on the show! And neither one of them knew the other was a spy. Great concept!
And this week, the great Lena Olin made her return to Alias!
I hear more former castmates are likely to join the show again in the coming weeks. I think it may be Melissa George (who was married to Sark's character in Season 3) or MAYBE, just maybe, it's Francie!!!!!
Now that The O.C. sucks and Alias doesn't, Alias is going on top of my Season Pass.
And this week, the great Lena Olin made her return to Alias!
I hear more former castmates are likely to join the show again in the coming weeks. I think it may be Melissa George (who was married to Sark's character in Season 3) or MAYBE, just maybe, it's Francie!!!!!
Now that The O.C. sucks and Alias doesn't, Alias is going on top of my Season Pass.
Reality Update
Growing up Gotti, which followed Victoria Gotti and her three heavily-gelled sons, and Airline, which followed Southwest airlines employees and passengers at a number of airports have both been killed after three seasons each.
However, Dog the Bounty Hunter, which follows a bounty hunter and his family, and Inked, a workplace series set at a Las Vegas tattoo company, have both been renewed by the network. According to The Hollywood Reporter, “star Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman did not come cheap, re-signing for about $100,000 per episode.” In February, 26 episodes of Dog will star airing, while Inked’s 20 episodes will begin airing sometime in the spring.
Being Bobby Brown will be back, but only for a half-hour holiday special. On Dec. 21, Bravo will air a half-hour episode titled “Christmas with the Browns,” which hopefully has nothing to do with Whitney pooping.
Fresh off of her break-up with Nick Lachey, Jessica Simpson is reportedly considering letting cameras follow her as she picks up the pieces and tries to figure out what to do next. Digital Spy says Jessica is “considering signing up for a reality show which would follow her life as a single woman.”
However, Dog the Bounty Hunter, which follows a bounty hunter and his family, and Inked, a workplace series set at a Las Vegas tattoo company, have both been renewed by the network. According to The Hollywood Reporter, “star Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman did not come cheap, re-signing for about $100,000 per episode.” In February, 26 episodes of Dog will star airing, while Inked’s 20 episodes will begin airing sometime in the spring.
Being Bobby Brown will be back, but only for a half-hour holiday special. On Dec. 21, Bravo will air a half-hour episode titled “Christmas with the Browns,” which hopefully has nothing to do with Whitney pooping.
Fresh off of her break-up with Nick Lachey, Jessica Simpson is reportedly considering letting cameras follow her as she picks up the pieces and tries to figure out what to do next. Digital Spy says Jessica is “considering signing up for a reality show which would follow her life as a single woman.”
Thursday, December 15
1933 King Kong
I watched the first 30 minutes or so. What a terribly written and acted film!!!! So far, at least.
Wednesday, December 14
No Way!!!
I'm home sick (that's why there haven't been updates this week), but I just read the greatest news! Showtime is exploring a possible pick-up of Arrested Development!! Yippee!!!
Monday, December 12
Winter Reality Guide
Here's a schedule of upcoming Reality shows:
Fear Factor [NBC, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 8]
Party Party [Bravo, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 9]
Queer Eye: The Wedding Season [Bravo, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 10]
Project Runway 2 [Bravo, Dec. 7, Wednesdays at 10]
The Biggest Loser: Special Edition [NBC, Jan. 4, Wednesdays at 9]
Dancing with the Stars 2 [ABC, Jan. 5, Thursdays at 9]
The Bachelor 9 [ABC, Jan. 9, Mondays at 10]
American Idol 5 [FOX, Jan. 17, Tuesdays at 8 and Wednesdays at 9]
Beauty and the Geek 2 [The WB, Jan. 12, Thursdays at 9]
Skating with Celebrities [FOX, Jan. 18 at 9, Mondays at 8]
Gastineau Girls [E!, Jan. 31, Tuesdays at 10]
America’s Next Top Model 6 [UPN, March 1, Wednesdays at 8]
Nashville Star 4 [USA Network, March 7, Tuesdays at 10]
The Contender 2 [ESPN, April]
Survivor Panama: Exile Island [CBS, spring]
The Apprentice 5 [NBC, spring]
Fear Factor [NBC, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 8]
Party Party [Bravo, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 9]
Queer Eye: The Wedding Season [Bravo, Dec. 6, Tuesdays at 10]
Project Runway 2 [Bravo, Dec. 7, Wednesdays at 10]
The Biggest Loser: Special Edition [NBC, Jan. 4, Wednesdays at 9]
Dancing with the Stars 2 [ABC, Jan. 5, Thursdays at 9]
The Bachelor 9 [ABC, Jan. 9, Mondays at 10]
American Idol 5 [FOX, Jan. 17, Tuesdays at 8 and Wednesdays at 9]
Beauty and the Geek 2 [The WB, Jan. 12, Thursdays at 9]
Skating with Celebrities [FOX, Jan. 18 at 9, Mondays at 8]
Gastineau Girls [E!, Jan. 31, Tuesdays at 10]
America’s Next Top Model 6 [UPN, March 1, Wednesdays at 8]
Nashville Star 4 [USA Network, March 7, Tuesdays at 10]
The Contender 2 [ESPN, April]
Survivor Panama: Exile Island [CBS, spring]
The Apprentice 5 [NBC, spring]
Upcoming Survivor News
From RealityBlurred:
As reality blurred reported exclusively in November, Survivor will yet again head back to Panama when the series returns in the spring. The 12th season of the series will be the third filmed in the same location.
However, while he teased the new season, Jeff Probst made no mention of the show’s third appearance in the same location. Instead, he focused new twists, the most significant of which gives the show its subtitle, Exile Island. Here’s how Jeff described the new game element:
“Next season, Survivor travels to a stunning location with an all-new twist. In the , that will play into the game like never before. Each week, at least one castaway will be banished to this desolate place, separated from their tribemates for days at a time in one of the most unforgiving environments yet. Strategy will be turned on its head, and survival will take on a whole new meaning. And though this island will be a place to be feared, something hidden within its rocky shores may be the key to $1 million and the title of ‘sole survivor.’”
At Survivor Maps, Dan Bollinger has identified “exile island,” and has noted three separate tribe camp locations, which could indicate either a start with three tribes, or a third location for the merged tribe.
Probst also promised us that the 16 players “will be divided into tribes in a way never before seen.” Survivor Panama will debut in the spring, although it does not yet have a premiere date. Presumably, it won’t begin until after the Olympics, which will air through the end of February.
As reality blurred reported exclusively in November, Survivor will yet again head back to Panama when the series returns in the spring. The 12th season of the series will be the third filmed in the same location.
However, while he teased the new season, Jeff Probst made no mention of the show’s third appearance in the same location. Instead, he focused new twists, the most significant of which gives the show its subtitle, Exile Island. Here’s how Jeff described the new game element:
“Next season, Survivor travels to a stunning location with an all-new twist. In the , that will play into the game like never before. Each week, at least one castaway will be banished to this desolate place, separated from their tribemates for days at a time in one of the most unforgiving environments yet. Strategy will be turned on its head, and survival will take on a whole new meaning. And though this island will be a place to be feared, something hidden within its rocky shores may be the key to $1 million and the title of ‘sole survivor.’”
At Survivor Maps, Dan Bollinger has identified “exile island,” and has noted three separate tribe camp locations, which could indicate either a start with three tribes, or a third location for the merged tribe.
Probst also promised us that the 16 players “will be divided into tribes in a way never before seen.” Survivor Panama will debut in the spring, although it does not yet have a premiere date. Presumably, it won’t begin until after the Olympics, which will air through the end of February.
Survivor!!!
From EW:
It's a rare reality-show finale that leaves me smiling and feeling content, but with Danni, Stephenie, and Rafe constituting an entirely deserving final three on Survivor: Guatemala, it actually took me a few minutes to find something to whine about. (Well, other than the fact that our regular columnist, Dalton Ross, is on assignment tonight, meaning we'll have to get by without his delightful reviewing skillz.) And then it hit me: How can any of these people claim to be true Survivors when they never had to gag their way through the traditional Survivor challenge of Swallow the Unsavory Local Delicacy?
Sure, Danni somehow remained physically and mentally strong while wasting away to the same weight as my five-year-old nephew. And it was nothing short of miraculous the way she managed to overcome a numerical disparity of six (post-switcheroo) Nakúm to one Yaxhá to outlast Judd, Jamie, Cindy, and Lydia. But if she never had to chow down on a half-formed bird fetus, or fight back her rising bile while gnawing on a fetid calf intestine, does she really deserve $1 million?
I'll begrudgingly say yes, only because on tonight's finale, Danni (along with Steph and Lydia) made me reach for the Tums with no help from Mark Burnett by pulling a charred chicken carcass from the ashes of a Mayan sacrificial ceremony they'd witnessed a few hours earlier, then greedily devouring it. Having Rafe object to the fowl act only made the moment that much more genius, as did food-obsessed Steph remarking, ''There's a dead chicken over there that's cooked to perfection!'' and wondering aloud if a ''a prayer of forgiveness or something'' might be in order to appease the Mayan gods.
(The ceremony also yielded the quote of the night, from Rafe: ''Steph's like, 'Did they kill it, Rafe?' And I'm like, 'Steph, they just ripped the chicken's head off and threw it in the fire. It's a dead chicken.' '')
Given the women's lack of cultural sensitivity (and disregard for the dangers of feasting on poultry that's been left sitting for hours in the Guatemalan heat), how awesome was it when that vicious thunderstorm came swooping down? For a second, I thought Rafe might've locked up victory by currying the favor of the Mayan ancestors, but then I remembered nothing annoys me more than when folks suggest that the results of network reality series are somehow part of God's master plan. I mean, if you truly have faith in a higher power, then it would seem logical to me that you'd figure he or she's got better things to do than to tune in to CBS every Thursday evening and breathlessly await Jeff Probst's weekly cry of ''Survivors ready? Go!''
Anyhow, if anyone was favoring Rafe in the immunity challenge that followed the chicken sacrifice, it was Survivor's producers. Seriously, the minute Jeff mentioned that the maze-ing race ended with a puzzle challenge, you knew the gay Mormon was going to crush Steph and Danni. The only surprise, in fact, was seeing Lydia's delighted expression when she climbed the ladder with all her pieces seconds before the challenge was completed. I know Rafe and Steph probably messed up by choosing to keep Danni over the spunky fishmonger, but when a contestant proudly boasts during tribal council that ''I did not win anything since day one,'' she needs to pack up her belongings, including the blow-dryer and hair product she must have had secretly stashed somewhere in the jungle. (Oh, come on now, you all saw the way her complicated, sweeping 'do didn't move for 37 days.)
Lydia's exit, though, may have inadvertently led to Rafe's demise in the game: Undoubtedly this season's strongest physical competitor, he was just a shade too confident that he'd make the final two no matter who won the endurance challenge, leading to his absentminded slip of the hand.
What he didn't count on was the fact the contest was ''weighted'' in Danni's favor: Given how emaciated she'd become over the course of the season, the final test resembled what you'd get setting a sack of potatoes (Rafe), a bag of rocks (Steph), and a pile of feathers (Danni) onto three wobbly pedestals. Clearly, the lightest load is going to have the smallest effect on the pedestal's equilibrium. Steph, however, tipped the balance in her favor by struggling valiantly as she lost and then weeping dramatically, inspiring Rafe to tell Danni she no longer had to honor her promise to take him to the final two. Poor Rafe seemed genuinely surprised when Danni wisely chose the generally disliked Steph to face the jury with her.
Was Steph's use of waterworks as strategic as the time last season when she persuaded Janu to remove herself from the game? If so, then more power to the big-hearted Jersey girl. I know a lot of folks who've been kvetching loudly about Steph's lies to the members of the Nakúm alliance. But if this were football, nobody would object to Steph's tackling an opponent. And in the game of Survivor, duplicity is perhaps the most essential skill of all. Knowing that, how can any fan of the show fault her for doing it, and doing it well? And how can Judd (or Jamie or Bobby Jon or Cindy) not respect the fact that they simply got outplayed?
To me, no one was more hypocritical or less amusing at tribal council than Judd. You know he so wanted to deliver a Susan Hawk ''snake-rat'' watercooler moment, but his ''the only thing you should be starving for is my vote'' was both embarrassingly rehearsed and too clever by half. (The only criticism I can offer up about Steph is that based on her appearance at the reunion special, the woman should not be allowed near a makeup table for the rest of her natural life.) Far more memorable was Rafe's emotional assessment that Steph was ''the ultimate Survivor,'' followed by his excellent advice that she use her closing statement to outline the reason she was more deserving than Danni.
While I have to give Steph credit for being refreshingly honest and admitting that she'd backstabbed during the game, she never did exactly articulate why she deserved to beat Danni. And maybe, on some level, it's because she didn't. Whereas Steph often seemed to be using Rafe's road map, Danni's seldom-recognized strategic planning was some of the best Survivor has seen: Aligning with the Nakúm members to vote out her buddy Gary? Demonizing Cindy's perfectly reasonable decision to keep the car — or should I say Torrent, since the word was mentioned some 347 times during the course of the episode and the pre-ad-break promos? Twisting Judd's smack talk to turn Steph against her No. 1 ally? Convincing Rafe she'd take him to the final two even if she knew he'd defeat her? And then flipping the script by coldly kicking him to the curb at the last possible second? She may not have swallowed a live insect, but Danni masterminded all those other steps to bring home the championship, one-upping her beloved Kansas Jayhawks in the process. Come to think of it, CBS should consider stealing Danni from radio and hiring her as an on-camera sports analyst. After all, there have been far less appealing reality-show has-beens who've scored a 16th minute of fame. Maybe it's time for someone who's smart, honest, and appealing to make the leap as well.
What do you think? Do you respect the game played by the three finalists? Who came off best and worst in the last tribal council? And who would you most like to see again on TV?
It's a rare reality-show finale that leaves me smiling and feeling content, but with Danni, Stephenie, and Rafe constituting an entirely deserving final three on Survivor: Guatemala, it actually took me a few minutes to find something to whine about. (Well, other than the fact that our regular columnist, Dalton Ross, is on assignment tonight, meaning we'll have to get by without his delightful reviewing skillz.) And then it hit me: How can any of these people claim to be true Survivors when they never had to gag their way through the traditional Survivor challenge of Swallow the Unsavory Local Delicacy?
Sure, Danni somehow remained physically and mentally strong while wasting away to the same weight as my five-year-old nephew. And it was nothing short of miraculous the way she managed to overcome a numerical disparity of six (post-switcheroo) Nakúm to one Yaxhá to outlast Judd, Jamie, Cindy, and Lydia. But if she never had to chow down on a half-formed bird fetus, or fight back her rising bile while gnawing on a fetid calf intestine, does she really deserve $1 million?
I'll begrudgingly say yes, only because on tonight's finale, Danni (along with Steph and Lydia) made me reach for the Tums with no help from Mark Burnett by pulling a charred chicken carcass from the ashes of a Mayan sacrificial ceremony they'd witnessed a few hours earlier, then greedily devouring it. Having Rafe object to the fowl act only made the moment that much more genius, as did food-obsessed Steph remarking, ''There's a dead chicken over there that's cooked to perfection!'' and wondering aloud if a ''a prayer of forgiveness or something'' might be in order to appease the Mayan gods.
(The ceremony also yielded the quote of the night, from Rafe: ''Steph's like, 'Did they kill it, Rafe?' And I'm like, 'Steph, they just ripped the chicken's head off and threw it in the fire. It's a dead chicken.' '')
Given the women's lack of cultural sensitivity (and disregard for the dangers of feasting on poultry that's been left sitting for hours in the Guatemalan heat), how awesome was it when that vicious thunderstorm came swooping down? For a second, I thought Rafe might've locked up victory by currying the favor of the Mayan ancestors, but then I remembered nothing annoys me more than when folks suggest that the results of network reality series are somehow part of God's master plan. I mean, if you truly have faith in a higher power, then it would seem logical to me that you'd figure he or she's got better things to do than to tune in to CBS every Thursday evening and breathlessly await Jeff Probst's weekly cry of ''Survivors ready? Go!''
Anyhow, if anyone was favoring Rafe in the immunity challenge that followed the chicken sacrifice, it was Survivor's producers. Seriously, the minute Jeff mentioned that the maze-ing race ended with a puzzle challenge, you knew the gay Mormon was going to crush Steph and Danni. The only surprise, in fact, was seeing Lydia's delighted expression when she climbed the ladder with all her pieces seconds before the challenge was completed. I know Rafe and Steph probably messed up by choosing to keep Danni over the spunky fishmonger, but when a contestant proudly boasts during tribal council that ''I did not win anything since day one,'' she needs to pack up her belongings, including the blow-dryer and hair product she must have had secretly stashed somewhere in the jungle. (Oh, come on now, you all saw the way her complicated, sweeping 'do didn't move for 37 days.)
Lydia's exit, though, may have inadvertently led to Rafe's demise in the game: Undoubtedly this season's strongest physical competitor, he was just a shade too confident that he'd make the final two no matter who won the endurance challenge, leading to his absentminded slip of the hand.
What he didn't count on was the fact the contest was ''weighted'' in Danni's favor: Given how emaciated she'd become over the course of the season, the final test resembled what you'd get setting a sack of potatoes (Rafe), a bag of rocks (Steph), and a pile of feathers (Danni) onto three wobbly pedestals. Clearly, the lightest load is going to have the smallest effect on the pedestal's equilibrium. Steph, however, tipped the balance in her favor by struggling valiantly as she lost and then weeping dramatically, inspiring Rafe to tell Danni she no longer had to honor her promise to take him to the final two. Poor Rafe seemed genuinely surprised when Danni wisely chose the generally disliked Steph to face the jury with her.
Was Steph's use of waterworks as strategic as the time last season when she persuaded Janu to remove herself from the game? If so, then more power to the big-hearted Jersey girl. I know a lot of folks who've been kvetching loudly about Steph's lies to the members of the Nakúm alliance. But if this were football, nobody would object to Steph's tackling an opponent. And in the game of Survivor, duplicity is perhaps the most essential skill of all. Knowing that, how can any fan of the show fault her for doing it, and doing it well? And how can Judd (or Jamie or Bobby Jon or Cindy) not respect the fact that they simply got outplayed?
To me, no one was more hypocritical or less amusing at tribal council than Judd. You know he so wanted to deliver a Susan Hawk ''snake-rat'' watercooler moment, but his ''the only thing you should be starving for is my vote'' was both embarrassingly rehearsed and too clever by half. (The only criticism I can offer up about Steph is that based on her appearance at the reunion special, the woman should not be allowed near a makeup table for the rest of her natural life.) Far more memorable was Rafe's emotional assessment that Steph was ''the ultimate Survivor,'' followed by his excellent advice that she use her closing statement to outline the reason she was more deserving than Danni.
While I have to give Steph credit for being refreshingly honest and admitting that she'd backstabbed during the game, she never did exactly articulate why she deserved to beat Danni. And maybe, on some level, it's because she didn't. Whereas Steph often seemed to be using Rafe's road map, Danni's seldom-recognized strategic planning was some of the best Survivor has seen: Aligning with the Nakúm members to vote out her buddy Gary? Demonizing Cindy's perfectly reasonable decision to keep the car — or should I say Torrent, since the word was mentioned some 347 times during the course of the episode and the pre-ad-break promos? Twisting Judd's smack talk to turn Steph against her No. 1 ally? Convincing Rafe she'd take him to the final two even if she knew he'd defeat her? And then flipping the script by coldly kicking him to the curb at the last possible second? She may not have swallowed a live insect, but Danni masterminded all those other steps to bring home the championship, one-upping her beloved Kansas Jayhawks in the process. Come to think of it, CBS should consider stealing Danni from radio and hiring her as an on-camera sports analyst. After all, there have been far less appealing reality-show has-beens who've scored a 16th minute of fame. Maybe it's time for someone who's smart, honest, and appealing to make the leap as well.
What do you think? Do you respect the game played by the three finalists? Who came off best and worst in the last tribal council? And who would you most like to see again on TV?
Friday, December 9
Brokeback Mountain
I saw it last night. The best review I can give it: everyone at the screening had tears in their eyes at the end of movie. This is The Bridges of Madison County (which was a surprisingly wonderful, deep movie) for gay cowboys. Really great filmmaking. It will be nominated for a shitload of Oscars. And Heath Ledger, in my opinion, deserves to win. And I thought Joaquin had it nailed.
Dancing With The Stars
Here's the line-up of "stars":
The lineup includes National Football League Hall of Famer Jerry Rice, Drew Lachey of 98 Degrees and brother of Nick, Oscar winner Tatum O'Neal, actor George Hamilton, ESPN personality Kenny Mayne and Stacy Keibler of World Wrestling Entertainment. Soap star Lisa Rinna, Hollywood actress Tia Carrere, newscaster Giselle Fernandez and teen rapper Romeo round out the field.
The lineup includes National Football League Hall of Famer Jerry Rice, Drew Lachey of 98 Degrees and brother of Nick, Oscar winner Tatum O'Neal, actor George Hamilton, ESPN personality Kenny Mayne and Stacy Keibler of World Wrestling Entertainment. Soap star Lisa Rinna, Hollywood actress Tia Carrere, newscaster Giselle Fernandez and teen rapper Romeo round out the field.
Wacko Back In The News
Pop star Michael Jackson's family is planning to trip to Bahrain to stage a drug intervention, the New York Daily News reported Wednesday.
"The family is in a state of emergency. They consider it a life-or-death situation," a source close to the family told the newspaper. The source said a phone call from the Jackson children's nanny to Randy Jackson raised concerns the musician is bingeing on drugs.
"The family is in a state of emergency. They consider it a life-or-death situation," a source close to the family told the newspaper. The source said a phone call from the Jackson children's nanny to Randy Jackson raised concerns the musician is bingeing on drugs.
Gimme A Break
Singer Ashlee Simpson reveals in Cosmopolitan magazine she spent six months of "not eating too much at all" until her family intervened.
--Perhaps her family should intervene her so-called music career, too.
--Perhaps her family should intervene her so-called music career, too.
Survivor
From EW:
''I'll think about you guys when I see the stars through my sun roof of my new car.'' — Cindy, after being voted out at tribal council
You know what I'll think about from now on as I look at the stars? Well, probably Halle Berry in a bikini, but you know what else I'll think about? What a moron Cindy is! First she wins the car, which guarantees you won't win the million dollars. You know why they call it the ''curse of the car''? Because you just won a freakin' car! In a game that is all about finding a reason to vote someone off, this is the ultimate reason. But then Probst goes and tells her about the curse and gives her an opportunity to give up the car while also giving away four free cars to her tribemates. Granted, having those four Pontiacs rolling up single file was the most blatant case of peer pressure since Mike Harmon in eight grade tried to convince me that ''all the cool kids smoke menthols.'' (Turns out he was wrong about that.) Anyway, after much hemming and hawing, Cindy decided to keep her new ride. Great. Now, not only was she getting a free car, but she was basically taking four free cars away from the people with the power to deny her a million dollars.
And who was the one to get all huffy and puffy about it? None other than Mr. Morals himself, Rafe! Now, it should be noted that I see Cindy's point in that they may have just voted her out anyway, so why not grab the free car at the very least? But that's a bunch of hooey. Rafe said it himself: ''If Cindy had decided to give the four of us cars, there is no way on earth I could vote her out at the next tribal council.'' Again, no way on earth!
Speaking of no way on earth, that brings us to the funniest line of the episode, which comes to us from Lydia before the reward challenge: ''I haven't really won anything, so I just have this crazy feeling that this might be my opportunity.'' Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. That is just too precious. Almost as precious as her comment about Rafe: ''We're looking at him as one of the girls.''
Hold on! Stop the presses! Stephenie has won an individual immunity challenge! It's funny because in Palau we talked about how Stephenie was such a fierce competitor stuck with a tribe full of lame-os, but this season she's been on top more for her strategizing than for her physical prowess (although we did see her pretty clearly swayed by Rafe in this vote). I do think Steph has pissed off too many people to win the final vote, though. It seems everyone who has come through Survivor Live has had less than kind things to say about the Jersey girl. And I don't know if anyone has enough respect for Lydia to hand her an oversize novelty check. (Although Judd surprisingly had some nice things to say about her last week — surprising in that Judd usually says nice things about…well, no one.) That leaves Rafe and Danni as the two people most likely to bring home the bacon.
Of course, when considering all this, one must also take into consideration what we saw in the promo clip for Sunday's finale. Why? Because there was a shot at tribal council of the final four that blatantly showed who was wearing the immunity necklace and the last letter of the 15th person voted out! What the hell? I freeze-framed that sucker, and it's as clear as day! Don't worry, I'll keep this spoiler free, but it's there if you want to check it out.
Speaking of checking out, that's me. I'm heading out to the finale in L.A., specifically to see if Bobby Jon is busting out any more sweet Miami Vice threads. (Don't worry, you'll still get a finale write-up — and surely from a much more qualified writer.) So thanks, as always, for playing along this season. Happy holidays and all that jazz. As the immortal Casey Kasem would say, keep your feet on the ground, and keep reaching for the stars. And when you reach for those stars, think of Cindy.
What do you think? What would you have done in Cindy's place? Did they really goof and put a spoiler in the preview of the finale, or was it a red herring? And who is going to win Survivor: Guatemala?
''I'll think about you guys when I see the stars through my sun roof of my new car.'' — Cindy, after being voted out at tribal council
You know what I'll think about from now on as I look at the stars? Well, probably Halle Berry in a bikini, but you know what else I'll think about? What a moron Cindy is! First she wins the car, which guarantees you won't win the million dollars. You know why they call it the ''curse of the car''? Because you just won a freakin' car! In a game that is all about finding a reason to vote someone off, this is the ultimate reason. But then Probst goes and tells her about the curse and gives her an opportunity to give up the car while also giving away four free cars to her tribemates. Granted, having those four Pontiacs rolling up single file was the most blatant case of peer pressure since Mike Harmon in eight grade tried to convince me that ''all the cool kids smoke menthols.'' (Turns out he was wrong about that.) Anyway, after much hemming and hawing, Cindy decided to keep her new ride. Great. Now, not only was she getting a free car, but she was basically taking four free cars away from the people with the power to deny her a million dollars.
And who was the one to get all huffy and puffy about it? None other than Mr. Morals himself, Rafe! Now, it should be noted that I see Cindy's point in that they may have just voted her out anyway, so why not grab the free car at the very least? But that's a bunch of hooey. Rafe said it himself: ''If Cindy had decided to give the four of us cars, there is no way on earth I could vote her out at the next tribal council.'' Again, no way on earth!
Speaking of no way on earth, that brings us to the funniest line of the episode, which comes to us from Lydia before the reward challenge: ''I haven't really won anything, so I just have this crazy feeling that this might be my opportunity.'' Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. That is just too precious. Almost as precious as her comment about Rafe: ''We're looking at him as one of the girls.''
Hold on! Stop the presses! Stephenie has won an individual immunity challenge! It's funny because in Palau we talked about how Stephenie was such a fierce competitor stuck with a tribe full of lame-os, but this season she's been on top more for her strategizing than for her physical prowess (although we did see her pretty clearly swayed by Rafe in this vote). I do think Steph has pissed off too many people to win the final vote, though. It seems everyone who has come through Survivor Live has had less than kind things to say about the Jersey girl. And I don't know if anyone has enough respect for Lydia to hand her an oversize novelty check. (Although Judd surprisingly had some nice things to say about her last week — surprising in that Judd usually says nice things about…well, no one.) That leaves Rafe and Danni as the two people most likely to bring home the bacon.
Of course, when considering all this, one must also take into consideration what we saw in the promo clip for Sunday's finale. Why? Because there was a shot at tribal council of the final four that blatantly showed who was wearing the immunity necklace and the last letter of the 15th person voted out! What the hell? I freeze-framed that sucker, and it's as clear as day! Don't worry, I'll keep this spoiler free, but it's there if you want to check it out.
Speaking of checking out, that's me. I'm heading out to the finale in L.A., specifically to see if Bobby Jon is busting out any more sweet Miami Vice threads. (Don't worry, you'll still get a finale write-up — and surely from a much more qualified writer.) So thanks, as always, for playing along this season. Happy holidays and all that jazz. As the immortal Casey Kasem would say, keep your feet on the ground, and keep reaching for the stars. And when you reach for those stars, think of Cindy.
What do you think? What would you have done in Cindy's place? Did they really goof and put a spoiler in the preview of the finale, or was it a red herring? And who is going to win Survivor: Guatemala?
Thursday, December 8
And In Breakup News....
From Gawker:
Nicole Richie and DJ AM have called off their engagement.
Oh, tragically frail Nicole. We’re going to have to put the poor thing on watch; to win AM back, she just might do something stupid. In a fit of hysterics, she’ll crawl to Carl’s Jr. and, as she weepily orders her meal, she’ll curse Paris Hilton and beg for forgiveness. And as Nicole shoves that $6 burger into her distended belly, her body will go into shock and we’ll inevitably find her days later, slumped over a formica bench, her once-lithe body smeared with ketchup and left for dead.
In the game of love, nobody wins.
Nicole Richie and DJ AM have called off their engagement.
Oh, tragically frail Nicole. We’re going to have to put the poor thing on watch; to win AM back, she just might do something stupid. In a fit of hysterics, she’ll crawl to Carl’s Jr. and, as she weepily orders her meal, she’ll curse Paris Hilton and beg for forgiveness. And as Nicole shoves that $6 burger into her distended belly, her body will go into shock and we’ll inevitably find her days later, slumped over a formica bench, her once-lithe body smeared with ketchup and left for dead.
In the game of love, nobody wins.
As If Breaking Bonaduce Wasn't Enough...
Danny Bonaduce will pose nude for Vanity Fair — because magazines don’t really want to, like, sell copies or anything.
Confronting Racism
I'll definitely be Tivo'ing this one. Looks like it will be interesting and thought-provoking.
From RealityBlurred:
FX confronts racism by changing black and white families’ races with makeup
A black family from Atlanta and a white family from southern California both changed their skin color with makeup and then lived together for six weeks for a new reality series.
FX will air the results as Black, White, a six-episode series that debuts in March.
The show is produced by American Candidate and American High producer RJ Cutler and Ice Cube. “Racism is prevalent, and white America and black America are two different places. The only way they’re really going to become one is if white people can find a way to see the world through the eyes of black people and vice versa,” Cutler told the New York Daily News.
He said that producers “spent the better part of a year … designing the makeup, which has the unprecedented bar of needing to succeed not only under the scrutiny of the cameras but to succeed under the scrutiny of another human being who would be standing 3 feet away from you.”
Responding to potential criticism about putting white people in blackface and black people in whiteface, Cutler says, “The fact that people are made up is not inherently problematic. … Young, old, male, female, the concept of living in someone else’s skin, there are many possibilities. I think anybody who’s interested in entertaining and engaging and dramatic television is going to watch this. This is dramatic storytelling, and at the center of it are big, fat, important issues.”
From RealityBlurred:
FX confronts racism by changing black and white families’ races with makeup
A black family from Atlanta and a white family from southern California both changed their skin color with makeup and then lived together for six weeks for a new reality series.
FX will air the results as Black, White, a six-episode series that debuts in March.
The show is produced by American Candidate and American High producer RJ Cutler and Ice Cube. “Racism is prevalent, and white America and black America are two different places. The only way they’re really going to become one is if white people can find a way to see the world through the eyes of black people and vice versa,” Cutler told the New York Daily News.
He said that producers “spent the better part of a year … designing the makeup, which has the unprecedented bar of needing to succeed not only under the scrutiny of the cameras but to succeed under the scrutiny of another human being who would be standing 3 feet away from you.”
Responding to potential criticism about putting white people in blackface and black people in whiteface, Cutler says, “The fact that people are made up is not inherently problematic. … Young, old, male, female, the concept of living in someone else’s skin, there are many possibilities. I think anybody who’s interested in entertaining and engaging and dramatic television is going to watch this. This is dramatic storytelling, and at the center of it are big, fat, important issues.”
Wednesday, December 7
Last Night's Nip/Tuck
I was dreading it, because it looked like one of those cheesy "special episodes of ER" or something. A plane crashes and Julia's mom is on it. Julia and Sean go to the sight of the crash to help with the victims. They help several people they come across, and towards the end of the episode, Julia finds her mom, badly scarred and almost unidentifiable. She is dead. Julia goes into a nasty tirade about how they don't love each other and how much better off she will be now that her mom is dead, she walks away, Julia's mom wakes up (nice, creepy twist), and Julia smothers her with a pillow and kills her. Yikes!
Julia goes home, and who is on her couch waiting for her to arrive? Her mom!
Can't wait for next week. Looks like the Carver is back again!
Julia goes home, and who is on her couch waiting for her to arrive? Her mom!
Can't wait for next week. Looks like the Carver is back again!
Arrested Development
OMG. So funny. I am going to miss this show terribly.
Charlize Theron put in her, I think, best performance in her handful of episodes. Best joke of the season: Her handler warns Micheal that if he would've seen her a year ago - before her plastic surgery - he wouldn't have fallen in love with her. And then they show a picture of Charlize in Monster with the caption "A Year Ago." Fucking hilarious!
Please, please, please... HBO or FX. Pick this show up.
Charlize Theron put in her, I think, best performance in her handful of episodes. Best joke of the season: Her handler warns Micheal that if he would've seen her a year ago - before her plastic surgery - he wouldn't have fallen in love with her. And then they show a picture of Charlize in Monster with the caption "A Year Ago." Fucking hilarious!
Please, please, please... HBO or FX. Pick this show up.
Kelly Bundy
Christina Applegate is getting divorced from her husband, Jonathon Schaech. Honestly, it's about time. She was getting too squeaky clean!
American Family Association
=
Ku Klux Klan
That's all I have to say. Hateful hateful people. Boo Ford. Good for you, Wells Fargo.
Ku Klux Klan
That's all I have to say. Hateful hateful people. Boo Ford. Good for you, Wells Fargo.
Two New Shows
...that I haven't had a chance to watch yet but are on my Tivo:
Triangle
Sleeper Cell
Anyone watch these?
Triangle
Sleeper Cell
Anyone watch these?
NBC Jumps on iTunes
It was a rumor yesterday, but it became reality today. Now downloadable:
Law & Order
The Office
Surface
Monk
Tonight Show with Jay Leno
Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Battlestar Galactica
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
Knight Rider
Dragnet
Adam 12
Awesome!
Law & Order
The Office
Surface
Monk
Tonight Show with Jay Leno
Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Battlestar Galactica
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
Knight Rider
Dragnet
Adam 12
Awesome!
Tuesday, December 6
I just peed my pants
First reviews I've read of King Kong and Munich. I cannot wait for these movies. I am a little boy.
I Want Some Cox
FX ordered a drama pilot called Dirt from exec producers David Arquette and Courtney Cox, set at a tabloid newspaper with the female Editor-in-Chief at the center. There is no casting yet on this project, though Cox could end up playing the Editor in Chief role.
I love her, and I want her back on TV. This sounds like a good project for her.
I love her, and I want her back on TV. This sounds like a good project for her.
Video iPod
ABC is still the only network to provide TV programming for the Apple iPod. But now ESPN (which is really just a part of ABC) and NBC might jump in. NBC would provide content from the Winter Olympics. Cool! Wonder how many people will begin watching at work.
Rachel Ray
This girl's got it goin' on!
I cooked a recipe from her new magazine (Everyday with Rachel Ray) and now she has a show debuting in the fall.
I cooked a recipe from her new magazine (Everyday with Rachel Ray) and now she has a show debuting in the fall.
Monday, December 5
Desperate Housewives
We all know it's not UNDER-rated. But do you think it's over-rated?
I think it's getting better. I especially liked Zach/Dana's homecoming. Nice and low-key. But... compared to last week's episode, which was awesome, this one was just eh.
I think it's getting better. I especially liked Zach/Dana's homecoming. Nice and low-key. But... compared to last week's episode, which was awesome, this one was just eh.
Mr. & Mrs. Smith
A charming Brad Pitt. A cold Angelina (bad actress?). A hilarious Vince Vaughn as a grown man who still lives with mommy. And lots of guns. Silly, fun entertainment.
Murderball
Think a documentary about paraplegics playing wheelchair rugby won't interest you? Think again.
This is one of the more touching, exciting and thought-provoking documentaries I've seen in a while. Mark Zupan is an inspiring. Mostly because he refuses to live his life differently than he did before his tragic truck accident. He is badass, and if you called him "crippled," he would kick your ass in a major way. He has a hot girlfriend and they have hot sex. And he LOVES competition. And he takes his rugby seriously. As do his teammates.
The documentary follows the U.S. and Canadian teams (rivals) all the way to the 2004 Paralympics in Athens. If you know anything about the Paralympics, it's anything but the Special Olympics. While the Special Olympics are important, its basic principle is that everyone is a winner. In the Paralympics, there is only one winner.
Watching them fight it out and go through the highs and lows of the game, you realize they are just like everyone else. And strangely, you don't feel sorry for them. (Which is, believe me, how exactly how they'd like you to feel about them.)
Watching this movie will make you think loads about your own life. What would happen if you or someone you loved became a paraplegic? Was it worth it that time you drove home drunk last week? Or what if some asshole was driving drunk and crashed into your car? Or what if you were riding a horse and fell off breaking your neck?
These are things that can happen in an instant and completely change your life. That is why this movie is such an inspiration. Because Mark Zupan and the other rugby players are just like us.
This is one of the more touching, exciting and thought-provoking documentaries I've seen in a while. Mark Zupan is an inspiring. Mostly because he refuses to live his life differently than he did before his tragic truck accident. He is badass, and if you called him "crippled," he would kick your ass in a major way. He has a hot girlfriend and they have hot sex. And he LOVES competition. And he takes his rugby seriously. As do his teammates.
The documentary follows the U.S. and Canadian teams (rivals) all the way to the 2004 Paralympics in Athens. If you know anything about the Paralympics, it's anything but the Special Olympics. While the Special Olympics are important, its basic principle is that everyone is a winner. In the Paralympics, there is only one winner.
Watching them fight it out and go through the highs and lows of the game, you realize they are just like everyone else. And strangely, you don't feel sorry for them. (Which is, believe me, how exactly how they'd like you to feel about them.)
Watching this movie will make you think loads about your own life. What would happen if you or someone you loved became a paraplegic? Was it worth it that time you drove home drunk last week? Or what if some asshole was driving drunk and crashed into your car? Or what if you were riding a horse and fell off breaking your neck?
These are things that can happen in an instant and completely change your life. That is why this movie is such an inspiration. Because Mark Zupan and the other rugby players are just like us.
Syriana
Dense. Interesting. Intriguing. Kind of boring. Good acting. Sort of thought-provoking. Not especially moving.
I think I'll give it 3 out of 4 stars, just because it aims high and it is, for the most part, quality filmmaking.
I think I'll give it 3 out of 4 stars, just because it aims high and it is, for the most part, quality filmmaking.
We can celebrate the holidays now...
Kathy Griffin and her husband, Matt, are back on. She made a funny about them being like Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee.
Friday, December 2
Why Bush Was Elected
Arrested and Kitchen will be done after a few more eps, and they'll replaced by a show called Skating with the Stars.
[Thanks Kristen @ E!]
[Thanks Kristen @ E!]
I hope it rains this weekend...
March of the Penguins
Mr. & Mrs. Smith
Murderball
I love Netflix. And apparently I organize my queue alphabetically.
Mr. & Mrs. Smith
Murderball
I love Netflix. And apparently I organize my queue alphabetically.
I just found the weirdest blog...
...and it has a picture of what Jennifer Garner would look like if she were a cat who gave birth to a litter of kittens. You have to see it to understand.
DUIs and Babies
Michelle Rodriguez and Cynthia Watros (also on Lost) get DUIs. Vince and Jen almost get DUIs (yeah right, you just know they were on coke).
And Jen and Ben have a baby girl. It was about time she popped! Violet Ann. Violet is cute. Ann is so 19th century.
And Jen and Ben have a baby girl. It was about time she popped! Violet Ann. Violet is cute. Ann is so 19th century.
NBC Puts Joey Out of Its Misery.
It's about time. Word is, although no one's officially said it, that is won't return.
Spike Lee Quote of the Day
"If there were good movies in the theater, they're not going to see a documentary about penguins."
NBC Grows Balls
Jen beat me to it, but might I add that NBC will air back-to-back new episodes of Scrubs on Tuesdays.
NBC just went from worst network ever to not worst network ever.
NBC just went from worst network ever to not worst network ever.
Speaking of Letterman
Does anyone else not give a shit about him and Oprah? What exactly is the big deal anyhow?
BREAKING!! Top Ten New President Bush Strategies For Victory in Iraq...
From David Letterman:
10. Make an even larger 'Mission Accomplished' sign
9. Encourage Iraqis to settle their feud like Dave and Oprah
8. Put that go-getter Michael Brown in charge
7. Launch slogan, 'It's not Iraq, it's Weraq'
6. Just do whatever he did when he captured Osama
5. A little more vacation time at the ranch to clear his head
4. Pack on a quick 30 pounds and trade places with Jeb
3. Wait, you mean it ain't going well?
2. Boost morale by doing his hilarious 'Locked Door' gag
1. Place Saddam back in power and tell him, 'It's your problem now, dude'
10. Make an even larger 'Mission Accomplished' sign
9. Encourage Iraqis to settle their feud like Dave and Oprah
8. Put that go-getter Michael Brown in charge
7. Launch slogan, 'It's not Iraq, it's Weraq'
6. Just do whatever he did when he captured Osama
5. A little more vacation time at the ranch to clear his head
4. Pack on a quick 30 pounds and trade places with Jeb
3. Wait, you mean it ain't going well?
2. Boost morale by doing his hilarious 'Locked Door' gag
1. Place Saddam back in power and tell him, 'It's your problem now, dude'
NBC Stuff
NEW YORK (AP) -- NBC is making big changes to its prime-time lineup for Thursday -- the night it used to own in the era of "must-see TV" -- by instituting a two-hour comedy block led by "My Name Is Earl."
Banished from the night, and temporarily off the air entirely, is "Joey," the spinoff that lost all of the energy and most of the viewers from "Friends."
Starting January 5, NBC's new Thursday lineup will be "Will & Grace," in its final season; the new buddy comedy "Four Kings"; the strong freshman show "My Name Is Earl"; and "The Office."
"ER" will remain in its customary spot at 10 p.m. ET, NBC said.
Banished from the night, and temporarily off the air entirely, is "Joey," the spinoff that lost all of the energy and most of the viewers from "Friends."
Starting January 5, NBC's new Thursday lineup will be "Will & Grace," in its final season; the new buddy comedy "Four Kings"; the strong freshman show "My Name Is Earl"; and "The Office."
"ER" will remain in its customary spot at 10 p.m. ET, NBC said.
Survivor: Ba Bye, Judd!!
This had to be one of the best vote-offs ever!!! Loved it!!
EW:
Sniff, sniff. Do you smell something? No, it's not Stephenie passing gas, but rather the stench of betrayal. And it smells good. Damn good.
Look, Judd was pretty much asking for the boot. He acted like a big buffoon for the majority of the season. He traumatized poor Margaret, vomited all over the shelter, and said the word man approximately three times per sentence. But still, that was COLD! And who did him in? None other than his Garden State girl, Stephenie. One minute they're hanging out with their loved ones together; the next she's slitting his throat. That was some Sopranos-type action. I guess that's the way they do things in Jersey. (Of course, I live in Jersey and the only thing I've killed recently is a few cans of Milwaukee's Best.)
Actually, I really have to give Danni the credit for this one. She saw an opening when she heard Judd talking turkey with Lydia, and immediately went to Stephenie with it. Was Judd gonna flip on Steph? No. But it doesn't matter. The seed of doubt was planted.
Now don't get me wrong — it's not like I actually feel sorry for the guy (although he did provide a pretty classic line when he equated the joy he got from having his wife visit to ''eating 25 White Castle cheeseburgers...man.'' Wow, and I thought Steph had some problems with gas). But I do have to give Judd props for giving us one of the all-time best Tribal Council send-offs EVER. Instead of ''Good luck!'' or ''Nice one'' or ''Bye, ya'll,'' he busted out a little ''I hope you guys all get bit by a freakin' crocodile.'' (???) Oh, and then he called them scumbags approximately 367 times.
Of course, this was made even sweeter (and more inexplicable) by the fact that just moments earlier he was talking about how all this friendship stuff was a bunch of hooey and that ''Everybody wants somebody to go home. That's the bottom line. That's what we're here for.'' (Also inexplicable was his assertion after getting voted out that ''The one thing I didn't do is lie to anybody...man.'' Reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaally? (Selective memory is awesome. I need to get me some of that.)
Speaking of selective memory, I was worried that I would be trying my hardest to forget the family visit portion of this episode, but it ended up not being quite as painful as usual. (Still painful, mind you, but a tad more tolerable.) The tears were relatively contained, and the segment was just tacked on to the end of the food auction challenge. I actually didn't even notice the family members come out at first because I was still so shaken up by hearing Jeff Probst inquire about Lydia's booty. (Watch out, Julie!) I still have no clue why no one else put up a fight against Danni in bidding for the immunity challenge envelope, though. A visit from a loved one is worth 880 bucks, yet help getting immunity is only good for 200? What the hell is that? How can you ever feel safe with only six players left? As evidenced by Judd, you can't.
And speaking of challenges, while I like the giant puzzle board challenge in theory, in practice it was pretty much impossible to follow and therefore completely drama-free. Much like a good portion of this season. Not last night, however, thanks to Jersey Judd. With Judd and Jamie now both on the jury, we should have some serious fireworks at the final T.C. This could be bad news for Stephenie, should she make it that far. They're more likely to feel betrayed by her than by anyone else out there. And they don't particularly seem like the type of chaps to put personal feelings aside and vote simply for who they feel played the best game.
As for who I'm rooting for, it would have to be Danni, who really showed me something this episode (something besides merely being hot, that is), and Rafe, who still looks like he's about to emotionally collapse at every turn, even when he's setting strategy and winning challenges. I would say he's climbed the top of my ladder, but well, you know how that goes with Rafe and ladders.
What do you think? Where does Judd's exit rank in the history of great Tribal Council send-offs? And should Danni try to form an alliance with Lydia and Cindy to take down Steph and Rafe?
EW:
Sniff, sniff. Do you smell something? No, it's not Stephenie passing gas, but rather the stench of betrayal. And it smells good. Damn good.
Look, Judd was pretty much asking for the boot. He acted like a big buffoon for the majority of the season. He traumatized poor Margaret, vomited all over the shelter, and said the word man approximately three times per sentence. But still, that was COLD! And who did him in? None other than his Garden State girl, Stephenie. One minute they're hanging out with their loved ones together; the next she's slitting his throat. That was some Sopranos-type action. I guess that's the way they do things in Jersey. (Of course, I live in Jersey and the only thing I've killed recently is a few cans of Milwaukee's Best.)
Actually, I really have to give Danni the credit for this one. She saw an opening when she heard Judd talking turkey with Lydia, and immediately went to Stephenie with it. Was Judd gonna flip on Steph? No. But it doesn't matter. The seed of doubt was planted.
Now don't get me wrong — it's not like I actually feel sorry for the guy (although he did provide a pretty classic line when he equated the joy he got from having his wife visit to ''eating 25 White Castle cheeseburgers...man.'' Wow, and I thought Steph had some problems with gas). But I do have to give Judd props for giving us one of the all-time best Tribal Council send-offs EVER. Instead of ''Good luck!'' or ''Nice one'' or ''Bye, ya'll,'' he busted out a little ''I hope you guys all get bit by a freakin' crocodile.'' (???) Oh, and then he called them scumbags approximately 367 times.
Of course, this was made even sweeter (and more inexplicable) by the fact that just moments earlier he was talking about how all this friendship stuff was a bunch of hooey and that ''Everybody wants somebody to go home. That's the bottom line. That's what we're here for.'' (Also inexplicable was his assertion after getting voted out that ''The one thing I didn't do is lie to anybody...man.'' Reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaally? (Selective memory is awesome. I need to get me some of that.)
Speaking of selective memory, I was worried that I would be trying my hardest to forget the family visit portion of this episode, but it ended up not being quite as painful as usual. (Still painful, mind you, but a tad more tolerable.) The tears were relatively contained, and the segment was just tacked on to the end of the food auction challenge. I actually didn't even notice the family members come out at first because I was still so shaken up by hearing Jeff Probst inquire about Lydia's booty. (Watch out, Julie!) I still have no clue why no one else put up a fight against Danni in bidding for the immunity challenge envelope, though. A visit from a loved one is worth 880 bucks, yet help getting immunity is only good for 200? What the hell is that? How can you ever feel safe with only six players left? As evidenced by Judd, you can't.
And speaking of challenges, while I like the giant puzzle board challenge in theory, in practice it was pretty much impossible to follow and therefore completely drama-free. Much like a good portion of this season. Not last night, however, thanks to Jersey Judd. With Judd and Jamie now both on the jury, we should have some serious fireworks at the final T.C. This could be bad news for Stephenie, should she make it that far. They're more likely to feel betrayed by her than by anyone else out there. And they don't particularly seem like the type of chaps to put personal feelings aside and vote simply for who they feel played the best game.
As for who I'm rooting for, it would have to be Danni, who really showed me something this episode (something besides merely being hot, that is), and Rafe, who still looks like he's about to emotionally collapse at every turn, even when he's setting strategy and winning challenges. I would say he's climbed the top of my ladder, but well, you know how that goes with Rafe and ladders.
What do you think? Where does Judd's exit rank in the history of great Tribal Council send-offs? And should Danni try to form an alliance with Lydia and Cindy to take down Steph and Rafe?
Thursday, December 1
Brokeback Mt. Premiere
From The PEN15 Club:
"Senior gay bloggers Trent and Perez Hilton weasled their way into (or, in Perez's case, close to) the Hollywood premiere of Brokeback Mountain last night. Because Ang Lee's passionate Western is to The Gays what The Passion of the Christ was to people who shop at Big Lots and have sex with their cousins, the boys' reaction to the festivities can best be expressed in a high-pitched squeal."
I just thought that was an amusing post.
"Senior gay bloggers Trent and Perez Hilton weasled their way into (or, in Perez's case, close to) the Hollywood premiere of Brokeback Mountain last night. Because Ang Lee's passionate Western is to The Gays what The Passion of the Christ was to people who shop at Big Lots and have sex with their cousins, the boys' reaction to the festivities can best be expressed in a high-pitched squeal."
I just thought that was an amusing post.
Lost: EW
From EW:
So, Kate and a horse walk into a flashback....
There's a general consensus among Lost fans that Kate is the blandest and least engrossing character on the island — this despite the writers' desperate attempts to give her a labyrinthine criminal history. Tonight's episode, the first Kate-centric one of the season, did little to reverse that perception. We learned that Kate was leered at and possibly abused by her stepfather. We learned that Kate learned that her stepfather was, in fact, her real father, from her real father, who wasn't her father at all. (All together now: Whaaa?) We learn that Kate has ''murder in her heart.'' (Pseudodad knew this from birth?) And that Sawyer loves Kate, at least when he's feverish and raving.
And all of this adds up to...a gorgeous black horse. Is it the emblem of Kate's tormented gypsy spirit? A spectral revenant of Wayne, the father she murdered? A symbol of redemption? The dark stallion mentioned in the book of Revelation (as many have suggested)?
Who knows? And, quite frankly, who cares? Kate and her Bonnie-sans-Clyde hillbilly backstory have both always promised more than they've delivered in the drama department. The best moments of this episode were on the fringes.
First there's Locke and Eko, a screen pairing we'd all like to see more often. I'd watch Terry O'Quinn and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje play Parcheesi in total silence — they're both so rapturously good. Tonight, Locke's dominance is seriously threatened for the first time: Eko comes bearing enlightenment and warnings. (''Do not mistake coincidence for fate.'') He brings one of the missing pieces of the Dharma orientation film. (There are several splices, so expect more nasty surprises.) And Michael, unaware of the ''new'' revelations on the strip, is tempted by that demon, instant messaging, and immediately succumbs.
''Dad?''
''W…!''
Nice.
What's not so nice: I can already feel the Dharma mythology getting tangled. Perhaps I'm paranoid. I just don't want us on the path to the Black Lodge.
Notice how I'm not even broaching the subject of Jack and Ana Lucia. I know how y'all feel about Little Ms. Gunhappy. But just for the record, not every interaction between a male and a female has to be primarily sexual — even on a desert island. Even over shared Hatch hooch. Jack and Ana Lucia, I predict, will have more of a Locke-Eko vibe than a Sawyer-Kate frisson. They're inverses, after all — if the island math holds up.
And now, dear friends, I have questions for you: What's the time line on Kate's tale of woe? Sharp-eyed viewers have noticed Sayid on the TV in Pseudodad's recruiting station — he's being led away in shackles by American soldiers. Does this put the incident in 1991? Were air bags standard on most cars back then? Am I overthinking all of this? Please set me straight. Or, failing that, buy me a pretty black pony.
So, Kate and a horse walk into a flashback....
There's a general consensus among Lost fans that Kate is the blandest and least engrossing character on the island — this despite the writers' desperate attempts to give her a labyrinthine criminal history. Tonight's episode, the first Kate-centric one of the season, did little to reverse that perception. We learned that Kate was leered at and possibly abused by her stepfather. We learned that Kate learned that her stepfather was, in fact, her real father, from her real father, who wasn't her father at all. (All together now: Whaaa?) We learn that Kate has ''murder in her heart.'' (Pseudodad knew this from birth?) And that Sawyer loves Kate, at least when he's feverish and raving.
And all of this adds up to...a gorgeous black horse. Is it the emblem of Kate's tormented gypsy spirit? A spectral revenant of Wayne, the father she murdered? A symbol of redemption? The dark stallion mentioned in the book of Revelation (as many have suggested)?
Who knows? And, quite frankly, who cares? Kate and her Bonnie-sans-Clyde hillbilly backstory have both always promised more than they've delivered in the drama department. The best moments of this episode were on the fringes.
First there's Locke and Eko, a screen pairing we'd all like to see more often. I'd watch Terry O'Quinn and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje play Parcheesi in total silence — they're both so rapturously good. Tonight, Locke's dominance is seriously threatened for the first time: Eko comes bearing enlightenment and warnings. (''Do not mistake coincidence for fate.'') He brings one of the missing pieces of the Dharma orientation film. (There are several splices, so expect more nasty surprises.) And Michael, unaware of the ''new'' revelations on the strip, is tempted by that demon, instant messaging, and immediately succumbs.
''Dad?''
''W…!''
Nice.
What's not so nice: I can already feel the Dharma mythology getting tangled. Perhaps I'm paranoid. I just don't want us on the path to the Black Lodge.
Notice how I'm not even broaching the subject of Jack and Ana Lucia. I know how y'all feel about Little Ms. Gunhappy. But just for the record, not every interaction between a male and a female has to be primarily sexual — even on a desert island. Even over shared Hatch hooch. Jack and Ana Lucia, I predict, will have more of a Locke-Eko vibe than a Sawyer-Kate frisson. They're inverses, after all — if the island math holds up.
And now, dear friends, I have questions for you: What's the time line on Kate's tale of woe? Sharp-eyed viewers have noticed Sayid on the TV in Pseudodad's recruiting station — he's being led away in shackles by American soldiers. Does this put the incident in 1991? Were air bags standard on most cars back then? Am I overthinking all of this? Please set me straight. Or, failing that, buy me a pretty black pony.
Wow
Less than 15% of movie studios' income is from theaters. The remainder is from licensing and sales for use in home. No wonder a movie can completely bomb at the B.O. but still be profitable.
A-
That's what Television Without Pity gives Lost:
Now this is an episode I dig. What Kate did was blow up her stepdad, who was actually her real dad, which made her angrier than the fact that he was beating her mom. She's captured by Mr. Marshal, who will eventually rue the day he ever picked up this assignment, but she escapes when the dent-proof car he's driving slams into a pole. On the island, this translates into her freaking out a lot and hallucinating just a little bit, and kissing Jack and running away from him. And she also sees a black horse, but if that's a hallucination, than Sawyer (who comes to and flirts with her and stuff) is having the same one. And what's especially weird about the black horse is that it was a black horse that the marshal was swerving to avoid when he went off the road and hit the car.
Locke screens the cult classic Orientation for Eko and Michael. What's kind of trippy about that movie is that if you play Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" it totally matches up. Locke and Eko are beginning their live game of backgammon, I think; at any rate, Eko sees the film and we find out that the Bible that the Tailaways snagged in Arrow station had a missing piece from the film. So Locke chooses the "deleted scenes" option on Orientation: Eko's Cut, and there's really not that much new revealed, just Dr. Kandel stressing that the computer is not to be used for anything other than entering the numbers, as that may cause another incident.
Michael is not in the hatch very long before he starts screwing around with everything. Unbeknownst to anyone else, while Locke and Eko are watching the lost Kandel scene, Michael manages to stop the timer, and then the computer says (well, displays, anyway), “Hello?” so he types it back. And then the computer displays, “Who is this?” And Michael types that it is Michael. And there is this long pause, and then the computer types, “Dad?” So in addition to everything else, the Others are not doing a good job of supervising Walt's internet usage.
Now this is an episode I dig. What Kate did was blow up her stepdad, who was actually her real dad, which made her angrier than the fact that he was beating her mom. She's captured by Mr. Marshal, who will eventually rue the day he ever picked up this assignment, but she escapes when the dent-proof car he's driving slams into a pole. On the island, this translates into her freaking out a lot and hallucinating just a little bit, and kissing Jack and running away from him. And she also sees a black horse, but if that's a hallucination, than Sawyer (who comes to and flirts with her and stuff) is having the same one. And what's especially weird about the black horse is that it was a black horse that the marshal was swerving to avoid when he went off the road and hit the car.
Locke screens the cult classic Orientation for Eko and Michael. What's kind of trippy about that movie is that if you play Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" it totally matches up. Locke and Eko are beginning their live game of backgammon, I think; at any rate, Eko sees the film and we find out that the Bible that the Tailaways snagged in Arrow station had a missing piece from the film. So Locke chooses the "deleted scenes" option on Orientation: Eko's Cut, and there's really not that much new revealed, just Dr. Kandel stressing that the computer is not to be used for anything other than entering the numbers, as that may cause another incident.
Michael is not in the hatch very long before he starts screwing around with everything. Unbeknownst to anyone else, while Locke and Eko are watching the lost Kandel scene, Michael manages to stop the timer, and then the computer says (well, displays, anyway), “Hello?” so he types it back. And then the computer displays, “Who is this?” And Michael types that it is Michael. And there is this long pause, and then the computer types, “Dad?” So in addition to everything else, the Others are not doing a good job of supervising Walt's internet usage.
Sheryl Crow
...has the worst booking agent.
She shows up on the most random shows (remember her Big Brother appearance?) and does the lamest gigs (remember her concert in an airplane?).
I just think she should be taken more seriously.
She shows up on the most random shows (remember her Big Brother appearance?) and does the lamest gigs (remember her concert in an airplane?).
I just think she should be taken more seriously.
Real World: The Reunion
What a riot! These bitches like to fight, and they really don't like each other.
Lacey, what a liar. I like her! But damn, she called everyone out on their shit behind their backs, MTV recorded and showed it to us, and yet she denies she did anything wrong. She is so disillusioned.
Nehemiah, what a homo! He spent the entire show complaining that they made him look like "a homosexual" (seriously, who says that word anymore) and then he went off on Danny for not returning his calls. They almost had an all-out brawl. I think he's jealous of Melinda.
Jo and Wes are, surprise, dating. I can't tell if she is cute or hideous. I think it depends on the camera angle. I guess they are cute together.
Melinda and Danny got engaged. They are like the super hot couple that doesn't talk to anyone else because they are "too good." I really dislike them a lot.
I am missing some things, but it doesn't really matter. All you need to know is that they spent an hour arguing.
Lacey, what a liar. I like her! But damn, she called everyone out on their shit behind their backs, MTV recorded and showed it to us, and yet she denies she did anything wrong. She is so disillusioned.
Nehemiah, what a homo! He spent the entire show complaining that they made him look like "a homosexual" (seriously, who says that word anymore) and then he went off on Danny for not returning his calls. They almost had an all-out brawl. I think he's jealous of Melinda.
Jo and Wes are, surprise, dating. I can't tell if she is cute or hideous. I think it depends on the camera angle. I guess they are cute together.
Melinda and Danny got engaged. They are like the super hot couple that doesn't talk to anyone else because they are "too good." I really dislike them a lot.
I am missing some things, but it doesn't really matter. All you need to know is that they spent an hour arguing.
Julia goes Broadway
And she's bringing two great guys with her.
Actors Paul Rudd and Bradley Cooper have signed up to join her in the revival of Richard Greenberg's Three Days Of Rain.
Cool!
Actors Paul Rudd and Bradley Cooper have signed up to join her in the revival of Richard Greenberg's Three Days Of Rain.
Cool!
Fey
NBC's untitled comedy project with Tina Fey, set in the backstage world of a weekly late night comedy show, has added Tracy Morgan to the cast. Fey is starring in the project as well as writing it, says Hollywood Reporter.
[Source: Cynthia's Synopsis]
[Source: Cynthia's Synopsis]
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